Sunday Trust online

Clarke & Ekekee’s blatant sedition (II)

Ekekee accused Naija’s 36 governors of squandering a paltry N6.5 billion security votes. In a country where Boko Haram, kidnappers, armed robbers and suicide bombers operate without licence, followers are worried that the amount is not tripled for the safety of these irreplaceable beings. Heaven has never made specie as delicate and valuable as governors. A governor’s life is worth much more than 1,000 of other disposable citizens. If I lie, ask how much Taraba, Enugu and Cross River are spending daily or how much it cost to treat Wada and now his Speaker locally. Citizens are free to die at will, not governors.

In their moment of sanity, sinators and representathieves would address Mr Ekekee for suggesting that their emoluments should be converted to generate jobs for commoners. Nothing I have ever read sounds so ungrateful. These legislooters left lucrative jobs to sleep in chambers, model the trendiest clothes, ride the flashiest cars, but find the time to pass budgets and so get fat paychecks. This nation will heal without them, but then we love the wounds they inflict on the economy.

Our economic team is made up of the best from the World Bank and trained in institutions versed in Shari’a law; they are incapable of doing wrong. I hope Ekekee and Edwin Clarke are not agents of destabilization sponsored by power hungry northern oligarchs to destabilize the most prudent government since the Evil Genius stepped aside?

Elder statesmen should not turn their back on their own rulers; they should rally the ethnic army against enemies of the clan. In times like this, one wishes that the sinate president had his way -- controls the cyberspace and the mass media. Citizens cannot be subjected to anything that pollutes the Transformation Agenda. Empirical evidence of sleaze contrasts with the conventional recommendation of attitude adjustment.

Both the feral government and Naija-delta governments are led by indigenous ‘Christians’, supported by jet-set pastors against armed northern elements. Alchemists marvel at the admixture of bigotry and politrics without national explosion, but we have made it. Has China the capacity to distribute free phones to its farmers?

Henceforth, anybody who wants to criticize the feral or stale government should obtain an indulgence from the Ministry of Misinformation that has the relevant committee to censor them before dispersing them on the Internet or mass media. Loyal pastors should censor their followers from granting press interviews or writing articles without indulgence. Chiefs should caution their subjects against holding views contrary to the general interests of their clan.

The money in question is derived from oil, the president is a son of the sh-oil, and so are the governors – they cannot mismanage what belongs to them. Governor Uduaghan, rather than send cows to those who make political mileage of it, send your cows to those whose critical criticisms may portray your benign administration in bad light. As for Ekekee, may your thoughts continue to go viral.


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